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Monday, January 22, 2007

Pimento Cheese Pals

In lieu of your standard Bacon Press post, I wrote a poem/song about my childhood, my best friend Douglas, and that Southern staple, that Carolina Caviar – Pimento Cheese.

It's not every day I write a poem/song for you all, but I figured you deserve it - what, with the weather, the stuff going on in the world, and all.



Momma bought pimento cheese down at the store
Brought it home stuck it in the frigerator door
Momma said "eat a little, I gotta run back out
Daddy's gone to sleep, you youngin's better not shout"

Pimento cheese, pimento cheese, why you that way
Coming inside from a long hot day
Staring back at me with that look in your eye
One more pimento cheese sandwich and I think I'm gonna die

Dogs out back they bark and they bite
I've seen one eat its doodie, you know that aint right
Daddy's gonna raise them, sell them for a little pay
I'd rather have pimento cheese than doodie anyday

There's my pal Douglas, he does as he please
His momma's crazier than a bucket of pimento cheese
Plays out all day and into the night
Cause the family's too poor to afford electric light

He's my best friend, we're brothers by blood
Blood's thicker than water, me and him are like mud
His sister's damn ugly, they're too poor to sneeze
But he can always have some of my pimento cheese

Playin' in the woods or jumping through the crik
Knocked down some sugar cane with a couple of sticks
Drankin' soda pop before dinner time
He's got a Mella Yella, I'm drinkin' Cheerwine

Now we're grow'd up I wonder how he's been
I haven't seen him since "Elvira" was Top 10
Up on Yellow Gap live these memories
Of my good little buddy and pimento cheese.



Anonymous Mark H said...

I don't think you've ever shown your "rooooots" quite so much as this salivating adoration of this "cheese product"............... I can deal with Spam much easier than Pimiento Cheeseeeee . . . . . But you DID upgrade it seriously with those photos. good job.

9:24 AM  
Blogger drbiggles said...

Most excellent song! Reminded me of one my friend Ed mostly wrote and I supplied the cool refreshing beverages for "motivation". I had to dig around over at textfiles dot com to find it. A lot of our work ended up on my BBS back in '89. Here!


By Ed Smith accompanied by Guy Prince (Sir Death)

Now I used to get so drunk, ol'Doc couldn't tell whether I was dead or alive.

Decided to settle down, sose I got married at the age of twenty five.

She had a couple of teeth missing and a bowl hair cut, ooh
wee.....what a cuute little thang.

A bow legged belle of the ball, in sixth grade gotsta be at least twelve or thirtaane

Oooh weeee, I love my sweet thang
Oh I love to love my Heather. I love to love my Heather more
than I love my pickup, houndogs and my beer all put together.

Now nine months later, came our first boy by the name of Billy-bob.

And just five months after, along came twins 'bout the time that I lost my job.

We had to buckle down, scrimp and save all our nickles, dimes and pennies.

That meant no more of them romantic dinners, down at the local Denny's.

Ooooh weee, I love my sweet thang
Oh I love to love my Heather. I love to love my Heather more
than I love my pickup, houndogs and my beer all put together.

The pickup would hardly run, the dogs went hungry, but ol'
Heather never shed a tear.

I pitched in and did my part, as I had to switch to generic

My gal was lookin' raggy, as all her clothes were just a fallin' apart.

Couldn't wait till I got some extra cash, to buy her fancy
things from K-MART.

Oooh wee, I love my sweet thang
Oh I love to love my Heather. I love to love my Heather more
than I love my pickup, houndogs and beers all put together.

Gone down thru' life, not carin' not really knoin' what love
was about, stickin' together when life got messy, like guttin' a trout, not listnin' to Heather when she got fussy.

Ya see life's kinda funny in it's own way.

Oooh wee, I love my sweet thang
Oh I love to love my Heather. I love to love my Heather more
than I love my pickup, houndogs and beer all put together.

Ah, good times.

9:08 AM  
Blogger cookiecrumb said...

Jeez, Biggles. How we supposed to write a comment after that?

2:27 PM  
Blogger drbiggles said...

Sorry, it's my nature.

An evil bucktoothed nature.


12:22 PM  
Blogger Ed Bruske said...

We love our p'menno cheese here in DC too.

8:01 AM  
Anonymous Duane said...


9:35 AM  

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